|Last week I wrote that how you describe yourself is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Deciding what kind of person you want to be is the first step to attaining the health and wellness you are looking for. This new identity is not a one time change, but a daily habit you build. This habit will inadvertently lead to changes in many other habits. (Strategy hard at work)*Step # 2 is finding your peeps.
You attract who you are.
If you’re confident, you attract confident people.
If you’re insecure, you attract insecure people.
If you’re adventurous, you attract adventurous people.
If you like to complain, you attract people who like to complain.
If you like to play sports, you attract people who like to play sports.
This is why if you want something to change, you have to start with YOURSELF first. Once you’ve got your new identity underway (revisiting your new identity and creating small wins to prove the new identity to yourself everyday), you will then want to find similar people.
If you try to be the new you with people who like the old you, you’re in for trouble.
Just becoming this new you will begin to attract new people, but taking a more proactive approach will lead to better and faster results.
You’re looking for 2 sets of people:
#1.) People like you who want to become a similar person/identity (the “new you”) as you. People who have decided that this identity is a priority and are on the same path as you.
#2.) People who used to be like you (the “old you”) who have already achieved the transformation to the new identity
Both sets of people are just like you, so they understand your unique difficulties and circumstances. Their path, feedback, and guidance is more relevant to you.
Trying to figure things out on your own is a path filled with many potential failure points. You need support, guidance, feedback, and accountability from the people around you.
If you only surround yourself with people who don’t want to take on the identity you do, and haven’t become who you want to be, you will feel that pull to be whoever they want to be and who they are now. You will use all your energy trying to resist them and justify why you want to make changes, and once you feel spent and defeated, you’ll go back to doing what you guys always do.